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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23666419">You Give Love A Bad Name</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Storygirl000/pseuds/Storygirl000'>Storygirl000</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Frozen (Disney Movies)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Crack, Gen, elsa is just done with everything, parody sues</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-04-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-03 00:21:46</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>445</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23666419</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Storygirl000/pseuds/Storygirl000</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>A couple of people compete for Elsa's hand, much to her immense annoyance.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>one-sided elsa/oc</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>You Give Love A Bad Name</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>When you've read about two different Sues/Stus being paired with Elsa and you're utterly fed up with both of them.</p>
<p>While the two OCs are based off of actual Sues/Stus I've seen, I've chosen not to name them or their creators for the sake of anonymity.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Elsa woke up that morning to the sounds of explosions outside the castle.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Startled, she quickly scrambled out of bed and ran out to the balcony to see what was happening. Waiting for her was an annoyed Anna.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Anna? What’s going on?” she asked her sister.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Anna grimaced. “Suitors. They’re competing for your hand.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>All at once, Elsa’s concerned look was replaced with an equally-annoyed one, and she buried her face in her hands and groaned.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Who are they, exactly?” she asked, not willing to deal with this.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Don’t know their names,” Anna replied. “They just showed up, declared their undying love for you, realized they had the same person in mind, and they’ve been fighting since.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Another explosion sounded. Elsa looked into the sky, where most of the fighting seemed to be taking place.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>One of the combatants was a woman around her age, with dark blonde hair and...were those wings? She blasted at her opponent with bolts of an indeterminate magic, and held a sword in one hand.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The other combatant was a far older man, with short, dark hair and a short beard. On his head was a cowboy hat, and over his hand was a golden gauntlet with six gems embedded in it. With each attack of his, one or several of the gems glowed.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Do you know what they’re like, at least?” Elsa asked.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Anna tapped her chin in thought. “Well, the girl claims to be the queen of some far-off kingdom – which, according to our records, doesn’t exist – and that you’re the destined mother of her kids, however </span>
  <em>
    <span>that</span>
  </em>
  <span> works. She also called me a ‘filthy pureblood’ when I tried to get her to leave.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“And the man?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Claims to be a demigod, that his sister is cousin Raps – which puts this </span>
  <em>
    <span>beyond</span>
  </em>
  <span> disturbing if that’s true – and that you’re a part of his harem alongside some other woman he called Selena. Whether this Selena actually </span>
  <em>
    <span>exists</span>
  </em>
  <span> is currently up for debate; all signs point to no.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>As the two of them watched, the woman hurled a fireball at the man, who responded by turning the fire into bubbles.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Elsa sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose. “Right, it's too early to deal with this. Mind stepping back for a second?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Anna stepped back, and Elsa summoned two orbs of icy energy to her hands before hurling them at the two would-be suitors.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It was a direct hit. Both combatants fell to the ground, hitting it hard.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Anna whistled. “Right in their hearts. You’re getting better at this, Elsa!”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Thanks,” Elsa replied. “Let me know if anything else happens.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>With that, she went back into the palace.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
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